Friday, 11 September 2009

Treason Committing Troll

I remember the day well. My head hurt and there was all that darned 'trip trapping' right above me. It went on incessantly and finally I could not take the noise any longer. I feel sure they told you they just wanted to cross the once, well I can assure you it was anything but the case. Over and back, over and back, it was horrendous.
Finally I blew my crust. It was the little one; so I threatened to eat him, not that he would have made a reasonable meal for this troll.
'Oh no', he said, making like he was scared 'please don't eat me. My brother would make a much better meal'.
I ask you, would you do that to your very own brother?
Anyway, I let him go and I notice he did not 'trip trap' back again so obviously my words had some effect.
Then along comes the middle one. By this time I nearly had steam coming out of my ears. 'Trip, trap'. It was just asking too much of anyone. I have worked hard to keep that bridge in good order and all they do is muck it up and make it even more filthy.
So I threatened to eat him as well.
'Oh no, no, no' he said 'my big brother will be along very soon and he will make a much better meal for you'.
I thought about it and he was probably right. Anyway, my headache was becoming quite migrainous and I was losing my appetite; so I let him pass as well - but what a strange family they must be, offering each other as sacrifices.
Along came 'biggie' with more of a 'thud, thump' than a 'trip trap' and I blew my whiskers out; completely forgetting that his horns were tougher than those of the other two. He soon had me trapped between the wall and himself so obviously I began to plead.
Well, that's where you came in your Majesty because he insisted I should get on his back and he brought me in here. I noticed he did not hang about long once the dancing started; dived right off without a by-your-leave; too chicken to stay I reckon.
It was the dancing that was my undoing. If I had not heard the King's Minstrels then I should have gone straight back to my post at the bridge; of course I would. Then; had I gone back he would never have found his way across, I am always so vigilant.
So I am desperately sorry your majesty, but for the three Billy Goats' Gruff, Peer Gynt would never have found his way into the Hall of the Mountain King.


  1. that gave me a chuckle just when i needed it keep up the good work look forward to reading more


  2. Thank you. I certainly wouldn't have worked up the courage to do a blog but for 'OR'.